tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-75914194381213581952024-03-05T02:49:26.278-06:00Brian Stultz's BlogAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14510856995907381038noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7591419438121358195.post-46256251647815458892018-10-22T13:19:00.003-05:002018-10-22T13:20:06.542-05:00College basketball owes it to clean programs to penalize bad behavior before NCAA Tournament<br />
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-style: italic;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">(Originally published by SECCountry and AJC.com in March 2018.)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-size: 16.000000pt; font-style: italic;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-style: italic;">“Congratulations to the 2018 NCAA Tournament champions, the (team redacted).” – Jim
Nantz, April 2, 2018
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">T</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">hat is the situation we are currently facing after the latest news regarding the FBI’s investigation into college basketball broke on Friday morning. Major powerhouse programs — including blue bloods such as Duke, Kansas, Kentucky and North Carolina — joined several
other schools in a controversy that has become a fork in the road for the NCAA and the future of the sport.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Late Friday, news broke that Arizona coach Sean Miller was caught by a FBI wiretap discussing a $100,000 payment for 2017 top recruit DeAndre Ayton. This is only the beginning of what could be a disastrous period for a lot of careers.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">For so long, the shady underbelly of college basketball has been at the brim of bursting
out of a dark cocoon and shedding light on what has been assumed but never outright
proven. Big-time shoe companies, agents desperate to get an amateur athlete under their
guidance and an overall system of corruption run the game, but no one has had the gall to
do anything about it.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The proverbial ball is now in NCAA president Mark Emmert’s court, and the next steps he
takes, which will be watched through a highly magnified set of glass, are of highest importance.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“Simply put, people who engage in this kind of behavior have no place in college
sports,” Emmert said in a statement on Friday. “They are an a</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ront to all those who play
by the rules.”
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Actions are louder, and a lot harder to execute, than words, and with a number of teams
involved in the allegations having a decent-to-great chance at winning it all during college
basketball’s prime event — the NCAA Tournament — those actions are needed soon.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">If there is any chance that a program is guilty of the allegations, it should face banishment
from the NCAA Tournament. When facing questions of eligibility, student-athletes are often
kept out of competition, so the precedent is there. When faced with doubt, it is better to
err on the safe side, or we could just see another Louisville situation, where wins and titles
are vacated years later and a school that is clean is denied a championship.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Ask Michigan players how they feel now that Louisville’s title is vacated. I’m certain they
aren’t going to be pleased.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Surely, fans of the programs listed in the report are currently saying something to the e</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ect
of, “Where is the due process? Nothing has been validated. By keeping us out because of
mere allegations, you are costing us a shot at a title when nothing could come out of this.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">My response, and what I think the NCAA’s response should be, is this: What about the
other teams that aren’t named? Should Purdue see itself defeated by a Collin Sexton-led
Alabama team, only to see that player’s eligibility come up again and again throughout a
drawn-out process? Should we see teams be left out and relegated to the NIT while Kentucky and Auburn make their way in?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Should we not reward those who play by the rules instead of casting doubt on who will be
recognized as tournament participants, Final Four achievers and the champion for months
and years to come?
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Frankly, I don’t want to see another banner be taken down due to inactivity by the NCAA.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Of course, we would be naive to actually believe the NCAA would go to these lengths. The
annual tournament, after all, means major money, and a lot of these teams named in the
probe are the cash cows. Duke and North Carolina fans would be quicker to cheer for
each other rather than see the NCAA prevent Mike Krzyzewski and Roy Williams from
strolling the sidelines in late March on CBS. What would March Madness be without John
Calipari’s mimicry that borders on the line of drama? This would be a lot easier of a call if it
weren’t for the names on the front of a lot of the jerseys.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The NCAA is aware of one important thing as well: Despite the controversy, the fact that
the chance exists that wins will be soiled and unforgettable moments erased from the history books, people will tune into the tournament in big numbers. Bars will be packed as
people take o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">work the first Thursday and Friday to see their brackets get busted, and Vegas will accept an insane amount of bets.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Emmert, in the meantime, has a chance to send a big message to the guilty parties and to
show the big guys that they are not above punishment. I’m not holding my breath, though,
nor do I expect much action as the NCAA accountants express their pleasure and the
pockets of the executives at both the association and schools get well-padded.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The NCAA Tournament will be played with a huge cloud hovering over it, and programs
that have gone above and beyond to circumvent the rules will be cheered, jeered, praised
and celebrated. If one of those listed in the FBI probe ends up on the podium, fans of that
school will celebrate, a trophy will be received by the head coach and, yes, a banner will
eventually be hung in the home gymnasium.
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">If I were a part of that respective arena’s maintenance sta</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">, I would make sure it is in an
easily accessible spot.
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14510856995907381038noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7591419438121358195.post-14963107217701882482018-10-22T13:01:00.000-05:002018-10-22T13:11:49.817-05:00Twitter, golf religion: The improbable story of befriending Hugh Freeze after his darkest hour<br />
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><i>(Originally published by SECCountry.com in June 2018.)</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><i><br /></i></span>
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“Do I already have you rattled?”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">It was a fair question. Hugh Freeze had just made an 8 on the par-4 second hole at The
Ole Miss Golf Course in our highly anticipated golf match, if only anticipated by the two of
us. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">It also was a crazy question. In the past, Freeze had gone into dreaded places such as
LSU’s Tiger Stadium and Alabama’s Bryant-Denny Stadium and walked out with victories.
Him getting nervous while playing golf against me, a man who had just again started play-
ing the game seriously after a 10-plus year hiatus? That wasn’t going to happen.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">To be honest, I am the nervous one. This is our first in-person meeting, I am on his turf and
... well ... I wasn’t sure how much he had read of what I had written about him in the
past. Oh, and there is the other thought that was going through my head leading up to that
first tee shot, one that I hooked badly into the woods: What in the hell am I doing here?
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">That requires me to start at the beginning, when I thought I knew who Freeze was. In the
end, I had absolutely no idea.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">What could he want with me?
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">It began with a direct message on Twitter. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Living in Chicago, I had met friends on a chilly
December Sunday afternoon to catch the late NFL games and caught a story on Freeze
that, at the time, caught me o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">guard. I fired o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">a tweet saying that I thought his redemption tour had started a little early. Within five minutes, a message appeared in my inbox. It
was Freeze. He wanted to get to know me and chat if I was up to it. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">I reread the sentence
six or seven times before responding, “I would absolutely agree to that."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Multiple questions rolled through my mind, and a lot of it was selfish: Had he read my stu</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff
</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">and wanted to yell at me? I once had concluded that he was more worried about himself
than the Ole Miss program and that calling himself a target because of his religious faith
was ridiculous.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">I also considered that I might be getting catfished. When else is a man of his stature going
to randomly reach out to me? Sure, working for SEC Country gives me a large audience,
but no one is going to confuse me with a well-known sports writer whom people subscribe
to.
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Mostly, and this was the cynical side of me, I wondered what his motive was. Why me?
Why now? Why everything?
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">What’s worse: The music or the swing?
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">After a quadruple bogey on No. 2, Freeze has had enough. Before I know it, he busts out a
speaker, ties it to the back part of the cart and the musical twang of Eric Church fills the
fairway. We basically have the course to ourselves, with him joking that “you should tell
everyone I reserved the entire place for us today.”
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">It is a somewhat serious match, one we had planned for a few months. At first, he was go-
ing to give me two shots per hole, but he talked me down to one. My game had improved
vastly since we decided on the outing, and 18 shots seemed fair. Bringing out the speaker
was just one way of getting into my head.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He warned me about a certain part of his game beforehand.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br />
“Just for the record, my swing is ugly but I get it in the hole,” Freeze proclaimed.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He wasn’t lying on either account. At times his hands will go over his head and make al-
most a figure eight on the way back. That is the best way I can think to describe it, and it
still leaves much to the imagination. Picture Jim Furyk’s swing but more ferocious. </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Granted, it isn’t as awkward — or outright bad – as some of the coaches who used to battle Freeze in the Chick-fil-A Peach Bowl Challenge. He reminds me that he and Wesley
Walls (a tight end at Ole Miss in the 1980s) won the challenge two years in a row. Noted —
another intimidation technique during the round.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The song Beachin’ by Jake Owen comes on the speakers and Freeze loudly proclaims,
“This is Brian’s song right here.” It didn’t matter that I had never heard it before. I had
moved to Fort Myers, Fla., just a month prior, and it managed to match the mood, of both
the day and my life, at the time. Freeze also could have been predicting my uncanny ability
to find any and all sand traps. Either way, the song is now on my iPhone playlist. After all,
he picked it for me.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">One of the best attributes I can say about Freeze is this: You feel comfortable within five
minutes of talking to him. He doesn’t have the social awkwardness that many coaches,
who are ultra-focused on nothing but football, can su</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">er from. It is simple to see why a
top-ranked recruit and his parents/guardians would trust him. His slow, Southern drawl
comes out, hooking you as he starts to expound on his life outside of football. Simply put,
I didn’t expect to have this much fun.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">Mistakes, regrets, expectations
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Many often forget this, but the coaches we expect to spend 20 hours a day in a dark film
room, analyzing each missed assignment, also have a wife and family at home in most
cases. Freeze cares a lot about his wife, Jill, and their three daughters.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">On the phone and in person, I could tell from both his voice and demeanor as he de-
scribed the rough days that began long before the public found out of his transgressions
last summer. The calls to the massage parlors. The mistakes made trying to run a football
program. He was apologetic almost to a fault, his voice coming to a hush at times as he
described having to tell his family what he had done. He spoke of the errors in judgment
he made and how he owned up to them. The hurt in his voice made me soften up a bit.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Since the beginning of our friendship, I have pondered this on many sleepless nights:
What do we expect out of the head coaches who we are so quick to build up and bring
down? </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Do we hold coaches to a higher standard than we do ourselves? Should we? I know I do,
and that is a bit unfair. If I were in the public spotlight, quite a few things would come out.
Basically, who the hell am I to judge someone?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">However, that is part of the job that I will argue they, not I, signed up for. They have a plat-
form that is unrivaled by the majority of people in this country, and the way they use that is
entirely up to them. However, it wouldn’t be right for me or for any other media member
not to challenge those issues, both through articles and in person. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Was he in over his head
at Ole Miss? Possibly. A quick rise from the high school level to a major NCAA program,
especially one in the SEC, had to be daunting. His faith, which would never be a talking
point at Briarcrest Christian School and Lambuth University, suddenly became a major
part of who he was – either good or bad – to the public who was being introduced to him.
Attention barreled down like a runaway semi-truck in the Tennessee mountains.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">Fishing reels and family
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">It wasn’t more than 15 seconds after entering a convenience store on our way to the golf
course when two men, standing in an aisle full of fishing equipment, start asking Freeze for
advice.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“What is your favorite reel to use?” one man inquires.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Freeze spends 10 minutes talking fishing with them while other customers come and go,
some taking the time to say hello to the coach.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">This isn’t an anomaly. Wondering how people felt in Oxford about Freeze, I found out
quickly. There isn’t a better way to find out until you walk into a gas station, restaurant or
any other establishment in the town with the man himself. He is greeted with a smile every</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">where. It almost feels like a scene out of The Truman Show, but with real people, not actors.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">It helps that he was born in Oxford. It also helps that during his time in charge of the Re-
bels, they won. He compiled a regular-season record of 39-25 and a 3-1 record in bowl
games in five seasons. But it is how approachable Freeze is at all times that is interesting
to watch. You couldn’t imagine many SEC, or any other Power 5 coach, taking the time to
explain the di</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">erences in fishing rods. He blends in. The goatee and somewhat of a beard
helps, but there is no sense of arrogance, no distance that he puts between himself and
fans. While some people call him coach, others call him Hugh. He’s one of them, and
damn it if they won’t defend and love him at all times.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">This feeling of acceptance despite all of the tribulations is one of the things that kept him
in Oxford, but it wasn’t the main factor. One of those would be a promise he hopes to keep
to his youngest daughter, Madison, a 15-year-old who just completed her ninth-grade
year.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“She asked that I only move her once during her four years of high school,” Freeze says. “I
have moved them all over the place before.”
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Therein is a Catch-22, not so much for Freeze, but for his family: By staying in Oxford even
longer, the girls are more prone to hear ugly rumors surrounding the man that they adore,
sometimes from classmates who are being teenagers. Locked in a community that is centered on the Rebels, everyone is sure to have an opinion and be willing to share it with anyone who will listen.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The bright side is that the true friends, the ones who that have stuck with the family
through everything, are by their side. High school is hard enough for a teenager to cope
with, but adding in a new school with new classmates multiplied by a famous father would
almost be too much.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">He’s Hugh, I’m Brian: 2 guys doing the best they can
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“Do you like cigars?” Freeze asks as we drove down the 10th fairway.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“At times, yes,” I answer.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">For him, the perfect round of golf starts at 4 p.m., when the course is almost empty and it
is just him and a couple of friends out there. </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He enjoys a cigar once a month or so during
those rounds, and being on the course can help clear his mind. He’s not “Coach Hugh
Freeze” anymore, but just another guy trying to master a game that can’t be mastered, </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">and who, despite his skill at the game, is still prone to the same bad shots that we all struggle with from time to time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">I had just popped my drive straight up in the air and watched it go higher in the air than
the distance it traveled from the tee box.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“You could fit four super Walmarts between your drive and mine,” Freeze boasts, a line I
will bring up later when he is just feet ahead of me after a drive on another hole.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He then hits a bad chip shot, costing him a chance at birdie, and for the first and only
time, I see Freeze get upset. I can only imagine it mirrored his actions after one of his quarterbacks threw an interception.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The music is turned up an extra level, and it makes him calm, him singing the words to I
Was Jack (You Were Diane), a tribute to John Mellencamp’s 1980s classic. He plays that
same song three times during the round.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">Still a competitor
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">On the par-5 14th hole, Freeze’s home-course advantage comes through in the luckiest of
ways. Stuck in the rough between five or six trees, he hits an iron that is heading right to-
ward the middle of one of the trees, with the impending result to be disastrous.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">That is when the golf equivalent of Chad Kelly’s interception-turned-touchdown pass to
Quincy Adeboyejo in the 2015 victory at Alabama happened. The ball comes as close to
the tree without hitting it and rolls right into the fairway.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">"How?" I ask out of curiosity.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Freeze looks over and grins. I only shake my head.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Bryan Johnson, a good friend of Freeze whom he lovingly refers to as DeChambeau after
the PGA Tour player, also joins us for the round. He and I hit our third shots close, both
within 10 feet of the cup, to set up our birdie putts. Amazingly, we drain both of them as
Freeze’s 30-foot putt lips out. Freeze is exasperated.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">I find my time to strike again, so walking o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">the green after giving my birdie compadre a
fist bump, I joke aloud, “We tried to lead the way for you, Hugh.”
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Freeze doesn’t show any response or emotion. The competitive side in him is showing.
Those gimme putts he was giving me earlier aren’t going to happen anymore.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">Football and forgiveness
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“I want to rewrite my ending.”
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">One of the major motivations for Freeze to get back into coaching is so his departure at
Ole Miss becomes a footnote, not his legacy. He’s only 48. He has plenty of time to do
that.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ensive mind is always working. Lest we forget, his Ole Miss o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ense averaged 40.8
points per game in 2015 against a tough schedule.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He talks about watching one bowl game last season and mentions that he couldn’t figure
out why the o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ensive line was blocking the defense the way it was, getting beaten up front
by an inferior opponent.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He won’t say this, so I will: As far as a human being, he does not belong in the same cate-
gory as some coaches who are mentioned in the same breath. I try to pull names out of
him, but he won’t take the bait, refusing to throw out people. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Curious, I question him on
how he would handle being the head of a football program if given another chance. As he
does with all of my questions, he doesn’t hold back, laying out part of a plan that he hopes
he soon will present to athletic directors looking for reasons to hire him.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He ponders the question again, drifting o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">with his thoughts. He looks at me and states, “I
will be more determined.”
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">It isn’t as if he needs to rush back into coaching. Speaking engagement opportunities are
rolling in for him and his wife, Jill, and for him, they come with a healthy fee. In January,
the couple spoke at Liberty University, a religious college in Lynchburg, Va. His emotions
came pouring out during that talk as Jill described her reaction and ultimate forgiveness.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“I know this man and I know his heart,” Jill Freeze said during the speech. “I know he’s go-
ing to do what it takes to get right with God. And so for that, it was easy enough in that moment to say, ‘I forgive you.’ Like, immediately."
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The opportunities to get o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">the lecture circuit and back on the sidelines eventually will be
there, but where is a bigger question. The SEC o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ffi</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ce seemingly put its foot down on-
Freeze coaching in the conference in the 2018 season, so whether or not that remains the
case will be seen.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The ultimate scenario, according to Freeze, would be a head coaching position where he
brings in old sta</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">members and gives them another great opportunity.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“When do you expect to coach again?”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He doesn’t give a definitive answer, but he’s confident it will be soon. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">Faith
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">We walk into Funky’s, a pizza and wings joint that he likes, located just o</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">the square
downtown. Since school is out for the summer and it is still early, the place is empty except for a few patrons having drinks or an early dinner.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“This place has the best pizza in the world,” Freeze promises me.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">I’m quick to call him out on this bold statement. After all, I have lived in New York City and
Chicago, places known for creating pies people crave.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“I would believe in the state of Mississippi, but the world?” I ask.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He quickly agrees to lower the standards just a bit, but he didn’t really need to. The sau-
sage and pepperoni pizza brought out was perfect, along with the BBQ chicken nachos
that we ordered as an appetizer. It suits the vastly underrated Oxford food scene well.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Behind the bar are eight large machines, each making di</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">erent types of frozen drinks. My
plan was to stick to just a beer, but the drinks look too refreshing. I go with the pink lemonade one first, then a mango margarita that helped soothe the heat from the jalapeños on
the nachos.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The conversation takes many turns, at one time being a debate about soccer vs. NAS-
CAR; he called me out for being such a big European fútbol fan and not understanding the
appeal of watching cars turn left for hours.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“I TiVo the race and watch the last 20 laps,” Freeze says. “I do that every week. I drove the
pace car at Talladega one time.”
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Sigh. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">I tout the atmospheres of stadiums all across Europe, including my beloved Fulham
FC in England and Hamburg SV in Germany, and he gives me the same reaction.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Next subject, I think to myself.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Religion, like during all of our conversations, is an arguable point. On that subject, we
could not be more polar opposites, but unlike most times the subject is broached, we<br />
don’t argue. Instead, one of us brings up our side of the story and listens to the other. For
him, it isn’t about the sets and rules that often are a major core of being religious but a relationship with Jesus Christ. Countering that I wasn’t sure how you could separate the two,
he continues.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">In January, he asked me to watch The Case for Christ, a movie about a man, much like my-
self, that questions the reality of it all. While the film wasn’t my idea of great cinema, I did
my part and finished it. Afterward, I grabbed my phone and typed out my reaction. We saw
di</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">erent perspectives from the film, but I agreed that some of the facts presented were intriguing.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">People continue to stroll into Funky’s and, more than once, Freeze is approached by some-
one who wants a picture with him or just to say hello. He always obliges. A recent graduate pokes me on the shoulder and asks if I will do the honor of taking a picture and for a
split second, I naively think he is talking about all of us until he hands me his phone. Once
again I am reminded that Freeze’s celebrity status remains high in this town.
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Pointing at a table at the front, Freeze describes the scene after the 2014 Alabama game,
the biggest home win in recent Rebels history.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“I got up on that in front of everyone and yelled ‘Are you ready? Hell yes, damn right,”’ the
start of the famous Hotty Toddy cheer that you hear at <i>every</i> Ole Miss event.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">A friend stops by and states that he hadn’t seen Freeze in quite some time. That is be-
cause Freeze doesn’t go out much.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">Domestic life
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“I go to the golf course, I go to church, sometimes Jill and I will go out to eat, but I’m
mostly spending time at home these days if I’m not speaking somewhere.”
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">This doesn’t mean Freeze stays still. He has a lot more time for the little things that, when
working in a demanding position like the head football coach, you just can’t do. Freeze is
spending more time with his father, Danny, something he missed out on for so long. On
our way to the golf course, Danny calls and they start arranging for him and four friends to
come to Oxford to play golf and stay at the Freeze home.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">In December, he sent me a text message during a situation that </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">almost every man can re-
late to: having time on the hands while shopping with his wife and kids before Christmas.
I’m just assuming he was bored while the rest of the family browsed through each store.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">It also became apparent that restraints on his time have kept him from watching many
movies. He’s never seen Chinatown or The Thomas Crown A</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">air, nor did he know who
Faye Dunaway was when I mentioned she was in the movie he had me watch. Hopefully
soon, I will talk him into sitting down and watching a movie dear to me: Fletch. Let’s hope
he enjoys the comedy of Chevy Chase. Of course, who doesn’t?
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Before the Super Bowl in February, he claimed to not know any Justin Timberlake songs,
but with three teenage daughters – along with Madison, he has Ragan, 19, who just finished her freshman year at Ole Miss and Jordan, 18, who will start at Auburn in the fall – it
is hard to believe that he has escaped the man’s music this whole time. He didn’t know
much about the halftime entertainment, but he definitely had a feeling on the game. I bet
him the Patriots would win, just another friendly wager in a long line I already have lost to
him.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">To her credit, Jill is determined to get him to Ireland to play golf this summer. I mention
how much I like traveling to Europe.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“I would just rather go to Scottsdale,” Freeze says.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br />
But what about Scotland? Germany? France? Any other place outside of the lower 48?
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“Scottsdale,” he reconfirms.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He tells an interesting story of going to Russia right after the fall of Communism. There to
help rebuild a church that was torn down by the previous regime, he stayed with a Russian
family that spoke no English – he speaks no Russian – and saw the citizens struggle to
keep food in the house, standing in line for basics such as bread.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">This July, he is taking the entire family to New York to see the smash Broadway hit Hamilton; I have been lucky enough to see twice. I spend the next five minutes trying to convince him — actually, promising him — that he will both love it and that the money he
spent on it (the number is astounding) will be worth it.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">So just who wins?
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">It comes down to the 18th hole, although we wouldn’t know until we compared scores
how close it actually was.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He got lucky – sorry, Hugh, but you got extremely lucky – on his drive, a tree knocking the
ball straight down into the rough instead of going into the junk that would have been hellish to get out of if he found the ball at all. Instead, he hits the green with his second shot
and two putts for par.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">A par putt refuses to find the hole for me, so I settle for another bogey and the round is
over. I didn’t play great – he promises to help me with my short game – but I didn’t play
badly, ending with a final score of 94. He shot a 75, meaning after all that, spotting me 18
strokes and everything, he had won by one stroke and, after that quadruple bogey on the
second hole, he had shot minus-1 the rest of the round.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“Maybe the rematch will be on one of your home courses,” Freeze says.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">I don’t care about the course, but the music selection on his speakers definitely will be
mine next time.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">’Just be sure to mention...’
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“You just didn’t like that I beat Auburn twice.”
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">I’m not sure whether he is joking or being serious, considering he knows how much I love
my alma mater. Then a smirk comes across his face and I lightly punch him in the arm. At
this point in the evening, it feels like we are old friends, not strangers and definitely not like
a journalist and a coach, my subject. Of course, this could also be some of those frozen
drinks getting into my system.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">The day went by fast, and between the lack of sleep the night before, the golf and now digesting my food, I was ready for bed. Freeze drove me the few blocks back to the Court</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">yard by Marriott on Jackson Avenue. We chatted for a few minutes in the car and then we
agreed to meet up again sometime soon.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">“Just be sure to mention how much I love my wife and kids," he reminds me.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;">My question gets an answer
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue"; font-weight: 700;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">So who is Hugh Freeze? That was the main question on my mind long before I arrived in
Oxford. You are prone to hear so many di</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">erent things about a public figure that you aren’t
sure what to believe. Of course, I had formed my own theories beforehand and wanted to
see where I was wrong and right.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">I was much more wrong than right.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Publicly, he is a football coach who can be outspoken about his beliefs; a man who uses
his fame to advance his platform; and a man who was part of a major investigation into his
football program that led to violations and his eventual firing for personal transgressions.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">Privately, you find the person who people cling to, a man who friends describe as a very
genuine person through good and bad and someone whose sense of humor will have you
crying in laughter. He’s a man who sticks to his conviction but would never judge others
because he has his struggles as well, some that became extremely public. He’s charismatic, self-deprecating and has so many other assets that you appreciate in a human being.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">In his own words, he is a sinner saved by grace and someone who isn’t sure he will ever
live up to God’s standard.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">If this comes across as a pu</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff </span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">piece, I apologize. It was not my intention. It is the last thing
I thought I would do, but after our long conversations and being around Freeze in person,
this is what I know: He’s a good man who made mistakes, had his private life exposed and
is trying to become a better human every day through every possible avenue, including
coaching. We all deserve second chances.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">My opinion on Freeze has changed, and it all started because of a direct message on Twitter. Why he reached out and how this has evolved will always be a mystery, but we both
agreed we are happy it happened. It is amazing what can happen when two people with
di</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">ff</span><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">erences sit down and have an actual conversation. That’s something that is becoming
rarer but is vital to going through life not holding unfounded grudges.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue";">He might now be a friend, but I’m coming for revenge on the golf course next time. The dinner tab that night will depend on it.
</span></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14510856995907381038noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7591419438121358195.post-12092380709154207572014-10-20T11:11:00.003-05:002014-10-29T11:17:31.752-05:00For a day, Mississippi is King of College Football<div class="MsoNormal">
It was a bad nightmare.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Cowbells kept clanging so hard my brain wanted to jump out
of my head.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An earlier rainstorm had
made my clothes feel as if they were in the middle of the rinse cycle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Oh, and my beloved Auburn Tigers had just
been defeated.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So why was I smiling?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Maybe it was because of the father I saw hugging his young
son, pure love coming from both of them.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Maybe it was due to the overwhelming look of happiness I saw
on fan faces as they celebrated like it was V-E Day.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It could have been the young woman, either overcome with joy
or booze or both, crying as she rang a cowbell bigger than her forearm.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I think, though, the reason for my smile is because I have
been in their shoes and know the pure exhilaration of a program-defining victory.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Their neighbor to the east, especially in football, has long
overshadowed the state of Mississippi.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>While Auburn and Alabama have captured the nation’s attention, Ole Miss
and Mississippi State have been considered also-rans.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Well, until this year.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Mississippi State just does not win big games.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That was the sentiment heading into the clash
between No. 2 Auburn and the No. 3 Bulldogs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Auburn has more talent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
moment is too big for State.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How will
they handle all this hype?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I mean, College Gameday was making their first ever
appearance in Starkville.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It shouldn’t have been the Bulldogs that we were worried
about.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Behind quarterback Dak Prescott, Mississippi State
emphatically answered any and all questions. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The record crowd grew louder with each touchdown, inching
closer to a victory of unseen proportions in this small western Mississippi
town.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The mass celebration really began in the middle of the 4th
quarter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have been in many great
atmospheres, but listening to the crowd sing Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing”
to the beat of 55,000 cowbells ranks right up there.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You know the phrase “act like you’ve been there
before?"<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That didn’t apply in this case.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mississippi had <i>never</i> been in this position
before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They came into the game with
their highest ranking in the program’s history.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>They left with a No. 1 ranking in the near future.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Walking down the seemingly endless ramp,
fellow Auburn fans and myself were invisible to the raucous Bulldog
faithful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead of the usual trash talk,
State fans were focused on their team, their fellow fans and, importantly,
their university.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For a day, there would be no more “thank God for
Mississippi” jokes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With Ole Miss’ win
against the mighty Crimson Tide a week earlier, the Magnolia State was on top
of the college football world, both figuratively and literally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All of the problems facing states like
Mississippi disappeared just for a while.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Women wept, grown men hugged, cowbells clanged and this
Auburn man couldn’t help but smile.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14510856995907381038noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7591419438121358195.post-73035311452120553002014-03-19T12:46:00.003-05:002014-03-19T18:31:05.081-05:00Jay Jacobs Over-"Jews" It In Pearl Press Conference<br>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHzcyB_I008nHshiAszTIno0gxsennM4qAZpeJQ1isw9ymtGJoVRFlWKaDwBEa27NDupPNR7cTYd0fZ_roVq2mDPoQF6tJFWlcFkFfsmzNTuBFaYx3uXoH39IVIZEwP2WYDV-fUnQMH4s/s1600/-6ae422779082d1ea.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHzcyB_I008nHshiAszTIno0gxsennM4qAZpeJQ1isw9ymtGJoVRFlWKaDwBEa27NDupPNR7cTYd0fZ_roVq2mDPoQF6tJFWlcFkFfsmzNTuBFaYx3uXoH39IVIZEwP2WYDV-fUnQMH4s/s1600/-6ae422779082d1ea.JPG" height="225" width="400"></a></div>
<br>
AUBURN - In a move to make newly hired Bruce Pearl, a man of Jewish faith, feel welcome in Auburn, athletic director Jay Jacobs went out of his way to make Yiddish references in his introduction of Pearl as head basketball coach.<br>
<br>
"Bruce is a real mentsh," Jacobs said to a confused, mostly protestant audience. "He will fit in perfectly with the Auburn family, or 'mishpocheh' if you will."<br>
<br>
Despite leaving Tennessee after being caught committing NCAA violations, Pearl is a popular hire among people on the Plains. "I'm getting all verklempted thinking of when he agreed to become our new coach," Jacobs stated.<br>
<br>
Pearl has been a successful coach in his career but does not come without baggage. Pearl, along with officials from the Auburn athletic department, will meet with the NCAA soon to hopefully have the show-cause penalty lifted before it expires on August 23.<br>
<br>
"Even with Pearl's past," Jacobs continued "I would have been a real shlemiel not to hire him. He is a proven winner and he will work his tuches off to make Auburn a winner again." <br>
<br>
Throughout the athletic department, employees were given orange and navy yarmulkes to wear and the flower arrangement at the front desk was replaced with an out-of-date Menorah. <br>
<br>
"We tried to tell Jay that Hanukkah was not occurring but he would have none of it," said Kirk Sampson, sports information director for Auburn University. "Earlier, we caught him stepping on a glass and yelling 'OPA!' and we had to alert him that that was, in fact, Greek."<br>
<br>
After the press conference, Jacobs could be heard praising Pearl's "shtick" on the sidelines and how he had "schlepped" all the way up north to meet with Pearl, who was working for ESPN.<br>
<br>
"He assured me that everything would be kosher when it comes to following the NCAA rules," Jacobs said while looking up the term "War Eagle" in Hebrew.<br>
<br>
When asked about Jacobs' comments, Pearl mumbled, "Freaking gentiles." Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14510856995907381038noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7591419438121358195.post-78755606650187713512014-02-17T10:38:00.000-06:002014-02-17T12:25:12.079-06:00Fixing U.S. Curling For 2018That's it! I am sick of waiting four years for curling to be highlighted and then watch the American men fail. I'm tired of losing to guys named Sebastian and Eriksson. It kills me when our skip chokes once again and the Americans are left conceding the match after the eighth end. This is the United States of America we are talking about! We can't dominate in a sport that you can drink beer while playing? Countries like Sweden and Norway are coming into our "house" and laughing after another easy victory? ENOUGH! If we follow these steps, we will be a dominant force by the 2018 Winter Olympics in Pyeongchang:<br />
<br />
<b>1. More Intimidating Athletes</b><br />
<br />
Our players look like accountants and real estate agents. No one will ever be intimidated by them. My solution? Bring in some current or recently retired NFL players, teach them the sport and then watch as they stand over the stone like a bad ass! The U.S. honorary captain is Vernon Davis of the 49ers, so we already have a fan. I am certain that Mr. Torger Nergaard of Norway will think twice before releasing the stone with Patrick Willis standing close by. Anyone would be more intimidating than this guy.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhztHgA6XbpLacmU1zT6vczJgve5C7MX7ADfzsFaoi4YwSrd1RRQAJFv-tPc3hkZYq7c0PjaL_mue4yVsNsZhJEdG1LxHxH2-K5SsBXLo8lphozPOqHWdDRSWdgoqf_HPZkHry7icgy1Vs/s1600/jpeg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhztHgA6XbpLacmU1zT6vczJgve5C7MX7ADfzsFaoi4YwSrd1RRQAJFv-tPc3hkZYq7c0PjaL_mue4yVsNsZhJEdG1LxHxH2-K5SsBXLo8lphozPOqHWdDRSWdgoqf_HPZkHry7icgy1Vs/s1600/jpeg.jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<b>2. Ban John Shuster from Curling</b><br />
<br />
Speaking of that guy, that is our current skip John Shuster. He also served in that position in 2010. Both Olympics have been epic failures for this guy. He is Bill Buckner, John Starks and Dan Marino<b> </b>all rolled into one. The most frustrating part of Mr. Shuster is that he starts playing well AFTER the U.S. is already eliminated from making the elimination rounds. He's David Wright in the eighth inning of a 12-3 game.<br />
<br />
<b>3. Full-Time Curlers</b><br />
<br />
You want to know how to tell we don't take the sport seriously? We make these guys go out and earn a living on their own while curlers in other countries compete full time. We don't make LeBron get a summer job, do we? You won't see Aaron Rodgers selling insurance during the off-season! (Okay, bad example.) Let's gather up some sponsors for these guys (I'm looking at you, corporations based in Minnesota) and make them full-time, at the rink 10 hours a day, curlers. <br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>4. Language Lessons</b><br />
<br />
Sure, our players can talk all the trash they want in English but so can the other teams. Now, how awesome would it be if our players could tell a Finnish curler to "not choke on your balls" IN FINNISH? That would have to freak them out a little bit, right? Two hours a day will be spent on learning trash-talk phrases in every competitors' language. This has to be worth at least 2-3 points a match.<br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>5. Get Our Fans Involved</b><br />
<br />
I am picturing a cross between the Cameron Crazies of Duke and the soccer fans in the movie Green Street Hooligans. Look, we as Americans are already known as the most obnoxious, loud and arrogant people on this planet. We might as well use that reputation to help out our now bilingual, muscular curling team. When the other team is about to release the stone, we can yell about their mother being the town whore. Other team trying to talk strategy? We chant as loud as we can about how their country is inferior to ours. I can just imagine the scene: Russia vs. USA, gold medal match, 10th end and we need a point. "GO STAND IN A BREAD LINE (CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP)."<br />
<br />
If we do these things, I foresee a team of Vernon Davis, Ray Lewis, Patrick Willis and J.J. Watt bringing home the gold. U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14510856995907381038noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7591419438121358195.post-79598185814647357462014-02-04T13:10:00.001-06:002014-02-07T15:28:23.953-06:00Russia To World: "We Thought You Were Joking!"<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJtF7gTEeq08CnyaYpjAgWUjQhHTjNnI-Q11h6EridkoqIU41dB-aYgcaOiyPAJqnX38Wbkr5wKYIobOioREEIOeF6H17hT0cw2e-nrSdbxl61esSCWwQIweAP4oTSpwX28h3-VteMz_k/s1600/putin460x276.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJtF7gTEeq08CnyaYpjAgWUjQhHTjNnI-Q11h6EridkoqIU41dB-aYgcaOiyPAJqnX38Wbkr5wKYIobOioREEIOeF6H17hT0cw2e-nrSdbxl61esSCWwQIweAP4oTSpwX28h3-VteMz_k/s1600/putin460x276.jpg" height="240" width="400" /> </a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
SOCHI - In a bizarre statement only three days before the start of the Winter Olympics, Russian President Vladmir Putin claimed during a press conference that Russia never actually thought the Winter Olympics would be held in Sochi.<br />
<br />
"We thought it was a prank," Putin stated while petting his toy poodle Magnus. "We are horrible people. Why would you ever agree to give us the world stage?"<br />
<br />
Reports of unfinished hotels and lack of the basic amenities in some rooms have filtered out over the past 24 hours as media have flocked to the coastal town. One reporter took to Twitter with anger after her hotel room did not have running water.<br />
<br />
"What were you expecting? We only figured out that these games were real like a week ago" said Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev.<br />
<br />
The press conference, which was delayed for 10 minutes while aides for both Putin and Medvedev searched for phone books for the two to sit on so they could reach the microphone, took place in what used to be the janitor's closet at the Sochi Best Western.<br />
<br />
"We all make mistakes," Medvedev continued "but this one is totally not on us. We thought you were joking. Why on earth would we host the Winter Olympics at the one place in Russia that doesn't get a lot of snow? That's just crazy talk."<br />
<br />
When asked why, if they thought it was a joke, the Russian government built a large stadium in Sochi, Putin responded, "Oh that? That, um, is just for monster truck rallies."<br />
<br />
A reporter from the BBC then asked whether the conditions at hotels will be better for the 2018 World Cup.<br />
<br />
"What? That is also real? That can't be real. Now, these pecs? These are real!" Putin shouted while disrobing.<br />
<br />
The press conference ended with both Russian leaders praising the work of the Russian people with "only weeks to prepare for the games" and Putin demanding the media to note that, even at just five foot seven, he is three inches taller than Medvedev.<br />
<br />
"He's so short!" Putin exclaimed.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14510856995907381038noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7591419438121358195.post-22532028543070040352013-10-21T09:02:00.001-05:002013-10-21T09:59:00.284-05:00BREAKING NEWS: GIANT HEAD ATTACKS POOL<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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Name="List Bullet 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Closing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Message Header"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Salutation"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Date"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Block Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Hyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="FollowedHyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Document Map"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Plain Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="E-mail Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Top of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Bottom of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal (Web)"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Acronym"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Address"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Cite"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Code"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Definition"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Keyboard"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Preformatted"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Sample"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Typewriter"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Variable"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal Table"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="annotation subject"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="No List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Contemporary"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Elegant"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Professional"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Balloon Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Theme"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true"
Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOG6lTkcktqnrwgypRpV7vH3G8PlC1XDg88cvLNkHo1MlpeDVq0lzdNhSGarqT_ONjlDKkBaoK61CgqNR7q_N8X5QGZBzAkVZ6ebsaEhZlVWFTIs32aEMJVHRjQNl2oXP2kBxysjikFGo/s1600/photo(1).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOG6lTkcktqnrwgypRpV7vH3G8PlC1XDg88cvLNkHo1MlpeDVq0lzdNhSGarqT_ONjlDKkBaoK61CgqNR7q_N8X5QGZBzAkVZ6ebsaEhZlVWFTIs32aEMJVHRjQNl2oXP2kBxysjikFGo/s320/photo(1).JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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Florence, Ala - Following Auburn's 45-41 win over Texas
A&M, a giant head attacked the shallow end of the pool at the Marriott
Hotel & Conference Center.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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The attacker, Brian J. Stultz, was taken to the local
hospital via ambulance where a CT scan was performed and results came back
that, despite evidence, the patient did have a brain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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A total of 12 staples were inserted in Mr. Stultz's head and
he was then released to the danger of the general public.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<div class="MsoPlainText">
The victim said, "I was just minding my own business
when all of a sudden I see this massive object flying toward me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am a little dented but will be okay as soon
as they clean all of the blood out."</div>
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When reached for comment, Mr. Stultz said that even
though he is in pain, he would gladly take 50 staples in the head if it meant a
win over Alabama.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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"What a win!" Stultz said as they led him to
the CT scan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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The doctors were worried about the state of Stultz's mental health when he listed both Charles Rooker and John Barry as his
emergency contacts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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"All in all, he is lucky to not be paralyzed or even
dead," the doctor said as Stultz continued to ramble on about his deep
love for Gus Malzahn.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdp_9N40bbqe3ghBJufQShKCfdYsbOWAWjTrXDb7-ojBO_IqeJcgi9Y7ShttPvHuTboCgM0L9amzQpJqB8eAOSW_SKukTD6C7VLrT8uZQbPsGNRvY1kKxvzGWv2OjyWZqKCHnkyDgxMgM/s1600/photo(2).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdp_9N40bbqe3ghBJufQShKCfdYsbOWAWjTrXDb7-ojBO_IqeJcgi9Y7ShttPvHuTboCgM0L9amzQpJqB8eAOSW_SKukTD6C7VLrT8uZQbPsGNRvY1kKxvzGWv2OjyWZqKCHnkyDgxMgM/s320/photo(2).JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14510856995907381038noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7591419438121358195.post-89608663761845960812011-09-07T21:47:00.000-05:002011-09-08T11:30:38.713-05:00A Tribute To My Friend Tom KowalskiThis past Saturday, as I was in Jordan-Hare Stadium watching my Auburn Tigers struggle against the Utah State Aggies, I kept looking down at my phone waiting for text messages I knew would never come. <br />
<br />
My friend Tom Kowalski died last week unexpectedly of a heart attack. The news of his passing still has me angry, shocked, and saddened. He was only 51 years old and still had a full life ahead of him. He was a great friend that I could count on during the best and worst times of my life. <br />
<br />
I met Tom like I meet most of my friends: at a bar. Hanging out at Scruffy Duffys on an Saturday afternoon back in October of 2006, I was just enjoying a beer and watching some afternoon college football. A few minutes later, Tom and his wife at the time asked if the two seats beside me were open. Twelve hours later, we were still there enjoying Bud Lights, watching Game 1 of his Tigers in the 2006 World Series and, like any friend of Tom can attest to, a few games of Golden Tee. (I will say that, due to a prior engagement, I was supposed to meet a friend to see "The Departed" that night. Tom was constantly mocking me and calling it "movie night". I returned to Scruffy Duffys in 30 minutes when the movie was sold out.) I had no idea who Tom was at that time and did not care. He was a fun loving guy that spun his chair around (he was amazed that they went all the way around) and yelling "Wheeeee!!!". <br />
<br />
After that night, we stayed in touch. We met up in Dallas to ring in the New Year for 2007. I came up to Detroit to meet him in November of 2007 and tailgated outside of the Big House before the Ohio State-Michigan game and then went to a (cough) strip club outside of Detroit with him. The next day, he had already reserved a ticket for me at the Giants-Lions game. When the Lions played at the Bengals in 2009, we met up at a bar across the river from Cincinnati and had another round of drinking until the bar closed. <br />
<br />
To call Tom just a guy who covered the Lions is a big understatement. He was the face of the Lions for many fans. This became apparent to me very quickly. A big guy who unfortunately somewhat resembled Matt Millen, Tom was not a hard guy to spot in a bar. No matter how many fans approached him, "Killer" was always willing to chat with them about the Lions. (Note: I told Tom very early on that I could NEVER call him "Killer".) He was personable, especially if the fans bought him a beer, which they almost always did. When you shook hands with him, you felt like you were never going to find your hand ever again. His laugh and smile was always there and he would never be afraid to tell Lions fans that the team just flat out stunk. He WAS their connection to their team.<br />
<br />
Tom was in New York in October of 2010. The Lions were playing the Giants that weekend and we met up at my local bar Hibernia. Along with him was his fiancée, Diane Wolan, who I could tell was special to Tom. We had beers, caught up and then said our goodbyes. I never thought this would be the last time I would see him.<br />
<br />
During the past six years, Tom would always text me before a big Auburn game to see if I was attending, during an Auburn game if we were playing great or horrible and after an Auburn game if we won or lost. He would always give me crap if I was not attending an important game. Last year, during Auburn's National Championship run, he was one of the first people to call me and wish congratulations after each and every game.<br />
<br />
I could not believe he was gone until this past Saturday, when I was attending the Auburn game. I kept on waiting for a text message from Tom but, in the back of my mind, knew that text would never come. He would have certainly had something to say about my school struggling against Utah State.<br />
<br />
Tom's funeral was on Saturday as well. To honor him, I drank Bud Light, played some Golden Tee and spun my barstool around as fast I could. "WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!"<br />
<br />
I miss you Tom and will always love you.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0